Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
