Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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