quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize