Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
