is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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