watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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