I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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