IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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