awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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