a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize