Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
