I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize