Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
you traded sex for a burrito?
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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