yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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