know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
