hell yes lets make some ravioli
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
