Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
