i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
