bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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