he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I intend to get homeless drunk
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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