About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Randomize
