like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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