You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
There r osticjed everywhere
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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