Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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