I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
