Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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