I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
