I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
