somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
