I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
