:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
