6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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