Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Green mimosas i think yes
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize