Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
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