It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
one might say we're banned from that church
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
