i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
