He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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