Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
