I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Randomize
