This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
