You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
