overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
