i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
