the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
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