You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
