I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
