Kiss
Puke
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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