Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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