I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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