gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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