You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
