The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
