i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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