After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
